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January 26th, 2005

You Know You Are “White Trash” When…..

Please don’t take this as a profession to my "White Trashiness." Sure, there’s a corner of my world that I remember that involved a small town, cow-tipping, big trucks, ball caps, flannel shirts and potlucks….but I dun grown up!

You know you are "White Trash" when…..

  • You have a can of "Beanee Weenees" in your cupboard
  • You know, or know someone who has gone cow-tipping
  • You have had to use an outhouse (especially if it is in your backyard)
  • Your idea of home improvement is attaching a camper shell to your double-wide
  • You decorate your window with the sheet Aunt Phyllis gave you for your birthday
  • You repair a cracked window with foil paper (you know, cuz it’s purty)
  • You keep a can of Raid by the kitchen sink
  • The only picture you have of your husband Ernie is the one where he’s holdin’ up that plaque with numbers on it (and he don’t look happy)
  • The sight of blind kids playing the banjo doesn’t faze you
  • You have a horse tank in your backyard (and NO, it’s NOT A SWIMMING POOL)
  • You call butter "oleo"
  • You still have a rotary phone in your trailer, er, home
  • You use Aqua Net for that "all day" up-do
  • You never had a dentist, and now you don’t need one
  • You know what "7-Up Cake" is
  • You’ve ever made "spaghetti" with ramen noodles
  • Your idea of fine dining is eating out of butter bowls
  • You have a hairnet
  • You know the words to "The Devil Went Down to Georgia"
  • You know who the Oakridge Boys are
  • You wore cowboy boots to prom (or that "company" Christmas party)
  • You can relate and empathize with the girl on Montel who doesn’t know who the father of her child is
  • You are one of the guys that could be the father of her child

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Uttered da Merri | White Trash Wednesdays | Link
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    WordPress database error: [Expression #1 of ORDER BY clause is not in SELECT list, references column 'merri_wrdp1.wp_posts.post_date' which is not in SELECT list; this is incompatible with DISTINCT]
    SELECT DISTINCT MONTH(post_date) AS month, YEAR(post_date) AS year FROM wp_posts WHERE post_date < '2024-04-01' AND post_status = 'publish' ORDER BY post_date DESC LIMIT 1

    WordPress database error: [Expression #1 of ORDER BY clause is not in SELECT list, references column 'merri_wrdp1.wp_posts.post_date' which is not in SELECT list; this is incompatible with DISTINCT]
    SELECT DISTINCT MONTH(post_date) AS month, YEAR(post_date) AS year FROM wp_posts WHERE post_date > '2024-04-01' AND MONTH( post_date ) != MONTH( '2024-04-01' ) AND post_status = 'publish' ORDER BY post_date ASC LIMIT 1

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    • WordPress database error: [Expression #1 of ORDER BY clause is not in GROUP BY clause and contains nonaggregated column 'merri_wrdp1.wp_posts.post_date' which is not functionally dependent on columns in GROUP BY clause; this is incompatible with sql_mode=only_full_group_by]
      SELECT DISTINCT YEAR(post_date) AS `year`, MONTH(post_date) AS `month`, count(ID) as posts FROM wp_posts WHERE post_date < '2024-04-17 19:15:48' AND post_date != '0000-00-00 00:00:00' AND post_status = 'publish' GROUP BY YEAR(post_date), MONTH(post_date) ORDER BY post_date DESC



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