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WTW - Pets Gone Wild!

Hi ya’ll!

Well, I reckun you all know that we White Trash grrls get all rambuncshius, especially afore we pop out little white trash sucklins.  Welp, I never knew, until my cuzin Otis tole me about our pets, that even our pets have their own kinda fun.  Lookin’ ’round the trailer park, I found out that I’ve been livin’ in Mad Dog land a little too much.  Ain’t it something how that Navy man’s coffee and a camera will getcha up and alert?

Anyway, I thought I’d dun share how crazy our pets get, too.  Hell, who says white trash folk are just human?  Take a swig of that whisky and set ‘er down on your TV tray - you ain’t gonna baleeve this!

This is Butch, our male pet squirrel.  He has a thang for beer, but mostly Bud.  He really enjoys it, but will only drink beer out of a can with a straw.  Damn finniky squirrel.  Oh, and here is his girlfriend Twila…she’s really into the leather thing.  We tell him she ain’t no good, but  he won’t listen.  He loves that Twila, but I think she’s in it just for the sex. 

Well, them squirrels sure keep things hopping, but our cousin, Mike (we call him MJ) has this thare monkey that has taken up smoking.  We have a shot of him smoking his Marlboros, but we know that ain’t all he’s smoking, crazy crack monkey.

 

hogs that thare remote.  My cousin Beulah Mae, she’s got this big ole pussy cat that sits on her couch watching Whiskas ads and drinking beer.  That damn cat owns her.  She’d dun tell you she trained the cat that way, but I know better. 

him an alcoholic rat.  He and Beulah Mae’s cat get together and sing show tunes after they’ve had a six pack.  It’s pretty  terrible to listen to I gotta say. 

Lastly, our damn dog Rover.  I can’t keep a smoke one or a pack of beer in the fridge a-cuz of that damn dog.  He’s sure smart when he’s sober, opening the damn ice box and all, but gets dummer as the drinks go down.

 

Welp.  That’s the end of my little story.  Ya’ll just gotta stop by our trailer park and visit my cousins and their pets.  You just won’t baleeve your eyes:

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