I was really going to take a night off from blogging tonight, really. But then I saw this tragic news that made me immediately feel as though I needed to ensure that your blogging friend and mine, Preston at Six Meat Buffet is okay now that the news is out. I think I now understand why Preston was off yesterday…
ROCK HILL, S.C. (AP) - Rock Hill police are looking for a hot hot dog. Someone appears to have stolen a sign featuring a giant wiener in a bun from the Ebenezer Grill after it closed Tuesday afternoon.
Investigators think the suspects should be easy to spot.
"It’s tough to hide a 10-foot weenie," Rock Hill police Lt. Jerry Waldrop said.
Um….no. I just can’t bring myself to comment on that last quote.
The smiling hot dog has welcomed customers to the restaurant for the past 18 months, after owner Loyd Ardrey bought it to replace the aging dog that sat atop the roof for years.
When Ardrey arrived around 6 a.m. Wednesday, the 30-pound aluminum sign was gone.
"I figured, well, maybe it blew off because we had some storms last night. We looked around, and it wasn’t in any yards next door or across the street or anything," Ardrey said.
Ardrey suspects some college or high school students took the sign as a prank or fraternity initiation.
The thieves had to work for their prize, Waldrop said.
"That thing had a lot of screws in it, and it was evident that the screws had been taken out," Waldrop said.
If he has to, Ardrey said he will buy another sign. The stolen sign cost about $600 dollars. He is thinking about offering a reward, but isn’t sure if he should give out money or hot dogs.
…and something that I’m certain has, at least once, resonated throughout the House of Meats:
"I just want my weenie back," Ardrey said.
Preston, just know that we are all here for you should you need an ear or a shoulder, but alas, not if you need a weiner.
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http://www.merrimusings.mu.nu/index.php/archive/preston-we-are-here-for-you/trackback/
Hey, I'd be glad to go help try and find Preston's weenie - but just spottin' the thing would probably be about as hard as tryin' to spot fly shit in a pepper factory. DO we get magnifying glasses???
Notes
Because it's time to shut the computer off and go read the latest edition of National Review (dead tree). I think I've found the missing weiner (still no word on Preston's whereabouts):WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A life-like prosthetic penis called the
Allright - If you're trying to call me out, it worked.
I am glad that Dan didn't go straight to microscope, but kept it at "magnifying glass". That's not quite as harsh.
Sun, Sand, Sharks
Apparently some people have missed me this week. Of course, they only really miss heaping abuse on me, but it’s nice to be remembered, even if it’s pure mockery.
