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American Idol: NY, NY

Given I’m supposed to finish up a project before my day job tomorrow, I won’t have much time to share my thoughts on tonight’s American Idol auditions in the good ole city of NY, NY. But I know AI starved fans are anxious to get their hands on *any* AI-related stuff, so why would I keep you in suspense? Here’s, well, something closer to word association versus free association. Heh.

Ian Benardo: He says “Ben-ardo” and I say “Ret-ardo.” Let’s call the whole thing off.

Sarah from Ohio: You’re 19. You don’t need Daddy’s permission to do ANYthing any more.

Fania: From Greece to Africa, and she took a left turn at apalling.

Ashanti: They said “As the American Idol Turns” and I say “As My Stomach Turns.” Get a clue - there were three Americans in the room and they said NO. America has *heard* you, so move on.

Amanda and Anotella: They both made it, but Anotella sings far better. Will their friendship survive Hollywood? Um, isn’t this about singing? To quote the MUSIC EXECUTIVE: “When someone’s down on the floor, kick them.” Could be interesting!

Clifton: Who told you ZZ Top screams when they sing? Damn!

Phillip: Does he have a flip top head?

William: AKA “It’s Pat!”

Kia: She did Aretha and got in. She was excited as hell. Simon says she has one problem, though. “No emotion.” HA! Such a funny guy that Simon!

Jenry: While he reminded me of Skelator, he had a great voice for a 16 year old.

Nakia: Should have stuck with the first song as you blew it with your second. You’ll be dancin’ in the streets at home, “Little Shirley.”

Sarah Goldberg: Hubby and I agreed that she was channeling “Fucking leftard.” Sarah, you’re right…you can’t sing. You don’t need to be taught how to sing, either. You need a valium and a dose of conservative. Jeez.

Antonio: He sang New Yor, New York. Can we get a “K” Vanna?

Jory: A Canadian who made a stop in Santa Monica on her way to American Idol. Isn’t this show “AMERICAN Idol?” Eh?

Porcelana: The “Rocky” of American Idol. She sang Mary J. Blige, and quite nicely. She scares me, though.

Christopher Henry: They thought he looked a bit like Simon, but when he sang, a woman’s voice clearly came out. I could close my eyes and see a woman in my mind. I would have never told him that. But Simon made it clear that he should have sang “in a dress and stilettos.” Harsh - at least it got a cussing rant out of Paula.

Rachel: Rachel was there, along with her other two personas. Oh, and all of them are going to Hollywood.

Chris from Virginia: Hubby: Yet another Mariah wannabe with balls. Me: Since he has balls, they’ll say he’s like Justin Timberlake. AI: You’re kind of like Justin Timberlake. Score: One for me, zero for da hubby. Should I be proud, or humiliated? ;)

Nick: Bailed on Hollywood last year and came back to redeem himself. He would have truly redeemed himself if he had sang “Buttercup.” Really.

Isadora: To quote Simon “rational advice isn’t necessary.” And she seemed to be orgasming right in the middle of the song - was I dreaming? Oh, yes, we were laughing too hard to really notice. But riddle me this…she said she was a clairvoyant. Wouldn’t a clairvoyant *know* if they are going to win or not?

Next week? Alabama. I bet Beth is lined up for her audition as we speak!

Nancy Stroosnyder said:

I can't bring myself to watch this show, even for laughs. I'm the one that guzzles my drink and walks out before the karaoke starts. Something in me just can't handle bad music. So.....I'm assuming these are your own comments? Very funny. Maybe if I had enough alcohol in me, I could perhaps watch a bit of this!

Merri said:

Yeah....these are my own comments. LOL

Trust me - it's extremely painful, but it's like rubbernecking when there's an accident - you just can't help it!

Chris said:

Gawd.....Isadora just scared the crud out of me! It hurt to watch her and the silent expressions on the judges' faces told the story.

Angela said:

I am officially tagging you!

TAG - You're It!

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